GENDEROSITY
GENDEROSITY
My definitions:
1. being generous of spirit to people of all genders or a gender different from yours;
2. the extension, overlap, and blurring of traits typically ascribed from one gender to another gender.
The word came to me unexpectedly: genderosity. I was listening to a friend wrestle with the expanding language around gender identity. The discomfort reflected the effort of recalibrating language and long-held assumptions in real time. Our vocabulary has evolved quickly, and not everyone processes change at the same speed. What struck me was how much of the tension centered on our capacity to hold unfamiliar ideas without tightening.
We’re living in a period where gender is discussed with greater nuance and visibility than many of us were raised with. For some, that shift brings relief and recognition. For others, it introduces uncertainty. Both reactions are part of how humans adapt to expanded frameworks. The more interesting question is what we do after we notice our reaction.
When I think about genderosity, I’m thinking about flexibility of mind and generosity of interpretation. I’m thinking about the willingness to examine assumptions we’ve inherited about masculinity, femininity, strength, softness, power, presentation, and desire. Gender has always been layered. Exposure simply makes those layers more visible.
EXPANDING THE FRAME
Consider the photograph of Michael Douglas by Martin Schoeller. When you look at it, what is your first response? Attraction, humor, discomfort, curiosity, admiration, confusion? Whatever arises is information. Art exposes the frameworks we carry without realizing it. Seeing a familiar public figure presented in a way that unsettles our internal script can create friction. That friction often reveals the boundaries we’ve drawn around what belongs where.
Genderosity invites us to stay with that moment longer. It asks whether we can expand our interpretation instead of rushing to categorize. It asks whether someone else’s expression of self requires us to shrink our own.
Photograph of a Female Bodybuilder by Martin Schoeller
The same reflection applies when looking at Schoeller’s photograph of a female bodybuilder. Strength has often been coded through a narrow lens. When we encounter strength expressed differently, it can challenge the categories we’ve absorbed. The athlete herself isn’t crossing a boundary. Our definitions are.
Throughout history, androgyny has surfaced repeatedly in culture. In the 1980s, artists like Annie Lennox, Boy George, and David Bowie expanded the public imagination through style and presence. Today, figures such as Jaden Smith, Tilda Swinton, Billy Porter, Ruby Rose, and Awkwafina continue to move fluidly across expression, demonstrating that identity has never been as fixed as we once assumed. Their visibility doesn’t create complexity; it reveals it.
HEAD, HEART, HANDS
For me, genderosity isn’t about memorizing terminology. It’s about practicing generosity in interpretation. It shows up in how we respond to someone who is further along in their exploration than we are. It shows up in whether we allow complexity without demanding immediate clarity.
I often return to a simple framework: Head, Heart, Hands. The head develops awareness of gender diversity beyond binary terms. The heart cultivates empathy for experiences not our own. The hands translate that awareness and empathy into behavior, language, and policy. Alignment across all three makes growth visible.
We don’t arrive at genderosity as a finished state. We practice it. We notice where we tense and where we soften. We expand our capacity to live alongside one another with greater nuance and less fear.
